I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Randomize
