Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
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