I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
