How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.