The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
If your nipples ruin my wedding photos I will kill you.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
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