We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Randomize
