I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
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