we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Randomize
