We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Randomize
