Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
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