what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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