Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
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