Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize