Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
Randomize
