Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Randomize