My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
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