yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
Randomize