weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Send help, water and tortillas.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Randomize
