Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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