Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
