well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
splinters make it hard to masturbate
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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