Sober January is a disaster.
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Randomize
