Tell her she can't have a vagina
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Randomize
