honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Randomize
