Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
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