How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
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