I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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