Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Randomize
