..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize