I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
just got out of a noise viloation because the cop recognized my roomate as his favorite chipotle burrito roller. just another reason I love ritos
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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