I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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