don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
And the cops told us we were all naked.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize