Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
Randomize