My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Randomize
