i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
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