I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
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