need another drink. this is the easiest way
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
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