THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
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