just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
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