Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Randomize
