I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
mondays should just be called national damage control day
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Randomize
