i think my mom watched the whole time
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
Don't EVER smell your tampon
Someone shattered a urinal.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
Randomize
