she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
Randomize