i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
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and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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