Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
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