now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
Who did Billy Mays play for?
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
Randomize
