Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
Randomize
