the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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