i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
high people should be assigned attendants
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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