It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
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