i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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